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Everyone in the kitchen instantly froze
in fearful anticipation of what was to come next. The usual bustle and hum of busy workspaces merging in a
symphony of activity became silent.
The incident: a burnt tray of chicken breasts, meant for a catered
dinner. The result: an over
reactive chef deciding to throw the food on the floor, kick a stack of empty
boxes and scream at a poorly prep cook who forgot the chicken in the oven.
Many of us have seen this happen before
and have stories we share with each other about the brutality we have survived
at the hands of bully chefs. Every working adult has known one - a
boss who loves making subordinates squirm, whose moods
radiate through the workspace, sending workers scurrying for cover,
whose very voice causes stomach muscles to clench and pulses to quicken. It
is not long before dissatisfaction spreads, rivalries simmer. Normally self-confident professionals
can dissolve into quivering bundles of neuroses. What
is found is that some of the behaviors that we think most that protect us are what in fact allow the
behavior to continue. Workers become desensitized, tacitly complicit and don't always act rationally.
Bullying
bosses differ in significant ways from the Blutos of childhood. In
the schoolyard, particularly among elementary school boys, bullies tend to pick
on smaller or weaker children, often to assert control in an uncertain social
environment in which they feel vulnerable. But adult bullies in positions of
power are already dominant, and they are just as likely to pick on a strong
subordinate as a weak one and women and are
at least as likely as men to be the aggressors, and they are more likely to be
targets. In leadership positions that require the exercise of sheer violent
will - on the football field or the battlefield - this approach can be
successful: Consider Vince Lombardi and George Patton. But in an office or on a
factory floor, different rules apply, and bullying usually has more to do with
the boss's desires than with the employees' needs.
A manager might use bullying to swat
down a threatening subordinate, for
example, or a manager might be looking for a scapegoat to carry the
department, or the supervisor's, frustrations. But most often managers bullied subordinates for the
sheer pleasure of exercising power. It is a kind of low-grade sadism that is the most common reason. They
start on one person and then
move on to someone else.
The mystifying thing about this pattern is that it does not
appear to undercut productivity. Workers may loathe a bullying boss and hate
going to work each morning, but they still perform. Researchers find little
relationship between people's attitudes toward their jobs and their
productivity, as measured by the output and even the quality of their work.
Even in the most hostile work environment, conscientious people keep doing the
work they are paid for. At the same time, some employees
withhold the unpaid extras that help an organization, like being courteous to
customers, helping co-workers with problems or speaking well of the company.
Yet this falloff in helpfulness and, indirectly, in performance is smaller than
might be expected, because fear motivates
different people differently.
It
is found
that in situations where bosses were abusive, some employees did little or nothing
extra, while others did a lot, partly covering for less helpful peers. It is speculated
that one reason people keep doing extra in these abusive situations is to
advance themselves at the expense of others. It makes them look good and the
others look that much worse. So
tyrants spread misery, and from the outside it looks as if they are doing a
fine job. It does not help
matters that people who enjoy abusing power frequently also revere
it and are quick to offer that reverence to the even-more-powerful. Bullying
bosses are often experts at "managing up." Ambition, experts say, is the bully's
most insidious deputy.
Subordinates know viscerally the high cost of going around a
boss, even if it is simply to file a complaint with the human resources department.
You are trouble. You are a whiner. You have called out the manager behind his
back. One reason we do
not know how effective it is to take on a cruel boss directly is because so few
employees do it.
For many people, run-ins with a supervisor
stirs up old conflicts with parents, siblings or other larger-than-life figures
from childhood. Nasty bosses often elicited from
subordinates defensive habits that they first developed as children, like
reflexive submission and explosive rage. Once these defensive positions lock in, it's like people are transported to a
different reality and can no longer see what's actually happening to them and cannot adapt.
Subordinate
status itself causes people to defer to a supervisor's judgment, especially in
well-defined hierarchies. It's the boss's job to make decisions, after all, and
co-workers may think there is some legitimate hidden reason for the boss's
behavior. Selfishly, too, workers who witness a boss humiliating a colleague
are relieved that the sword has fallen elsewhere and are secretly pleased that
they look more competent by comparison.
Staff members are delighted to receive praise from a boss, but even more delighted when the praise is
accompanied by news that another colleague is struggling.
This occupational schadenfreude is
evident when employees observe a co-worker being bullied. After watching in
silence, they then begin to resolve their guilt. They do this by wondering
whether maybe the person deserved the treatment, that he or she has been
annoying, or lazy, they did something to
earn it. The brutal behavior goes unchallenged, and the target feels
a sudden chill of isolation that is all
too real. By doing nothing even
people who abhor the bullying, become complicit in the behavior and
find themselves supplying reasons to justify it.
The most common form of resistance to a
cruel manager remains the old-fashioned grousing session. Sharing the misery
over lunch or a drink can makes everyone feel a little better and signal the
first step in jointly responding to
the abuse. Informal comiserating sessions may evolve into effective
resistance when workers are united, well connected with others in the
organization and trust the company's higher-ups to hear their case.
More often, though, grousing simply feeds
on itself, sometimes devolving into elaborate self-contained gatherings in
which the central activity is bad-mouthing and mimicking the boss. Employees in tight-knit informal groups
may ironically be less likely to think about confronting their bosses. Instead, they may retreat to their informal groups to let off steam. It is those who are not part of a tight
group, who feel truly desperate and in danger of losing their jobs, who appear
most likely to speak up.
Most others learn to perform an elaborate dance, trying to preserve their
status while being careful not to forfeit their sense of decency, all the while
looking for an escape hatch.
One of the best strategies to manage a bully is to watch for
patterns in the tyrant's behavior. Maybe he is bad on Mondays, maybe a little
better on Fridays. Maybe she is kinder before lunch than after. If the Broncos
lost the day before, it is not a good day to ask for anything. If some types of
assignments spook the person more than others, avoid them, if possible. When
the nostrils quiver and the lip tighten
all
is not lost. Ignore the insulting tone
of a boss's attack and respond only to the substance of
the complaint. If it is a deadline problem, address that. For an attack on a particular skill,
discuss ways to improve.
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